Did you know you’re the source of so much good and happiness?
If you don’t, it’s time to remind yourself.
Anxiety and depression will do it’s best to make you think you’re no good – but that’s really not true.
You’re an inspiration.
You don’t get everything right and you make mistakes, but so does everyone else.
People draw strength from you.
You make others smile and laugh.
You’re unique and special.
You’re a good person.
You deserve to be as happy as anybody else.
Don’t allow anxiety and depression to cause any doubt. Love yourself - you have a lot of offer.
“Love yourself—accept yourself—forgive yourself—and be good to yourself, because without you the rest of us are without a source of many wonderful things.”
- Leo F. Buscaglia
How does the word change make you feel?
Does it send shivers down your spine, or fill you with excitement? If it’s the latter, you’re part of a very exclusive club.
Change has a habit of filling us with fear and scaring us into submission, which is why so many of us continue with the things we know aren’t any good for us (like abusive relationships and dead-end jobs). The fear of change definitely kept me in places I didn’t want to be.
Having less anxiety and stress and more happiness and prospects means we need to start embracing change – otherwise things will just stay as they are. We have to take the rough with the smooth, and accept that change will bring challenges.
Maybe it’s time to appreciate that these challenges aren’t any worse than the ones you currently face. How bad can change be compared to the present?
The fear of change can make the clock go by very quickly.
High anxiety sufferers are creative. I don’t believe this to be a coincidence - you have to be creative to become consistently anxious!
There is no doubt in my mind that you have a gift, and allowing this gift to be represented by high anxiety is an injustice.
“Anxiety is the handmaiden of creativity.”
- T.S. Eliot
Channel this creativity into something positive, something that offers a challenge.
The reason I had severe social anxiety is because I didn’t have anything to talk about! Nothing was going on in my life. Anxiety kept me locked away in my tiny little world, and there wasn’t any new information entering my mind. That’s why having a hobby is important. You learn new things and meet new people, giving you something to talk about.
My personal passion is cooking. It allows me to be very creative. Other creative hobbies could include photography, painting, or learning a language or instrument. Creative hobbies that include exercise, such as dancing and gardening, are even better.
Use your gift of deep thought and understanding to gain knowledge. Read books that sparks your imagination. Subscribe to magazines on subjects of interest. Watch documentaries on interesting subjects. I developed a fascination for astronomy after watching a documentary. Whenever I feel a little anxious or stressed (everybody does) I often look up at the sky. It helps remind me my problems aren’t as big as I thought they were.
Voluntary work allows you to help people without all the pressure and stress that normally comes with paid work. Psychologically, this is very powerful and rewarding. I’m a strong believer in whatever you give out you get back in multiples. I know most of us have a million and one reasons why we’re too busy to do this or that, but donate just a little of your time (even if it’s just an hour a week) to helping others and reap the rewards.
When you decide to leave the highly anxious you behind, you’ll appreciate how much time you dedicated to being anxious. This creates a big gap in your life that needs filling. This gap can make it easy to revert back to old habits, so keep yourself active and busy, and don’t allow yourself time to be anxious.
Try things out until you find something you’re passionate about, things you enjoy so much you ‘forget’ to be anxious.
Are you putting it off? Procrastinating? Umming and ahhing?
The only reason you’re not making a solid decision (or change) is because you’re scared of something. What is it?
Do you fear what’s on the other side of your decision? Maybe you don’t want to take responsibility if it all goes wrong?
Things seem this big (I’m extending my arms out as wide as they can go) before you actually do them. Afterwards, the rewards far outweigh the initial concerns.
Change requires bravery, but not as much as you think.
I received an email following my last blog, which inspired this one.
Jane wanted to know how I got more certainty in my life because she recognised uncertainty was one of the main causes of her anxiety. It’s not an uncommon question - uncertainty is a breeding ground for anxiety, fear, and stress.
I got more certainty back in my life by continually reminding myself that I always had more than one option.
Whether at home, work, or with friends and family, I always had a choice, no matter the circumstance. It wasn’t always obvious, particular at my very lowest points, but I always had more than one option.
Life gave me choices. All I had to do was work a little to create them. The return I got from this tiny amount of work was the feeling of freedom. When I didn’t feel trapped things became much more clear and achievable.
If things don’t go right, go left. By adopting this mentality, we don’t ever have to feel stuck or uncertain again.
‘Surely it can’t be that simple.’
Why is it, even if something is glaringly obvious, we try to throw a spanner in the works by causing doubt?
Maybe it’s because we’re too quick to follow the crowd, even if that means doing things that have never worked?
The funny thing about the simplest and best theories is that they are sometimes the hardest ones to spot and act on.
If you have too much uncertainty in your life, tip the BALANCE by creating more certainty. Maybe the result is far less anxiety?
Sometimes things really are that simple.
The best way to connect with Carl and join the discussion is on his Facebook page